


watch out for flying glass

by fieryrondo



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: 2018 Skate Canada International, Character Study, Drabble, Ficlet, Gen, POV Second Person, very very unpolished but i need to write so i don't forget how
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-09 05:16:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16443614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fieryrondo/pseuds/fieryrondo
Summary: Everything was so good. Until it wasn't.Lessons learned at Skate Canada 2018.





	watch out for flying glass

**Author's Note:**

> The usual RPF disclaimer applies. This is a work of fiction and any resemblances to real life skaters are entirely coincidental.
> 
> While Evgenia is not my favorite skater, I find her competitive spirit and grit very inspiring. As I mentioned to a fellow fan, it was very surreal to see her finish with such a human score. Within the space of an hour (med school is harddd *sobs*), I wanted to try to capture some of that strength here. I don't think I was successful but it was also nice to step out of my comfort zone and write from a POV other than Yuzu or Javi.
> 
> Unbeta'ed.
> 
> Feedback welcome.

Everything was so good.

Until it wasn't.

The trouble with reinvention was that you started not from the ground up but somewhere beneath it. A hole wholly of your own making. But you're no stranger to hard work. In fact, part of you is relieved that it is so hard. Because that tells you more than anything that you're making the right choice. Your laughter carries across the ice, as sure as your blade. Toronto is not Moscow. It is full of trees and mountains and nature across an orange colored sky. Squirrels and raccoons and chipmunks, a veritable zoo, but you grow to love it. Just as you grow to love your programs. You work hard, harder than you've ever worked before. There is so much that you have to learn, that you will learn. Skating is your life and you are so so glad for it.

You clutch Luna a little harder. It's not the first time you've sat in the kiss and cry with disappointment festered in your breast. The blow feels just as raw as it did in Pyeongchang. It is a bitter lesson to learn. You've dug deep. Too deep perhaps. So deep you've exposed your roots, naked and bare for the entire world to see. The foundation that holds you up, picks the ice, and vaults you into the air with wings, a goddess of victory crooning in your ear. You can't hear her song anymore, even as the crowd buoys you up with rallying declarations of love and support.

You turn away. You want to scream. And you will. Ensconced in the privacy of your room, you'll scream and berate yourself for having made such a costly mistake, that lapse of concentration that is so unlike yourself. So unlike Evgenia Medvedeva. You'll pace and berate yourself in the same self-punishing breath long into the night until Brian knocks on your door. You'll put your phone away. 

You talk and he listens in that encouraging way that he does, with the air of someone who knows what it is like to let Olympic gold slip from your fingers. You gather your strength for tomorrow.

You skate. You don't win. But as you look out into the darkness from the podium, you feel something ease.

You know you can do better.


End file.
